Stage 1 - SMART
This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject
in the known Universe. You know you know everything and want
to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this
stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are
talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting
argument when both parties are SMART.
Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING
This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING
person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can
go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and
really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still
SMART, so you can talk to this person about any subject
under the sun.
This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject
in the known Universe. You know you know everything and want
to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this
stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are
talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting
argument when both parties are SMART.
Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING
This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING
person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can
go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and
really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still
SMART, so you can talk to this person about any subject
under the sun.
You’re supposed to be tough in your life, and not a wimp. But are you always happy to have it your way? Here’s one day in the life of a though guy:
I was getting ready for work when I looked out the window and saw the utility company starting to erect a pole in front of my house. they were going to position it directly in front of my picture window.
No way, absolutely no way was I going to permit this. I gulped down my last bit of coffee and went directly to the crew supervisor and told him in no uncertain terms that I was not going to permit his crew to put that stupid electrical pole directly in front of my picture window.
He took out a plat map, a map for pole locations and a right of way document and explained that it is the best location for it. I told him it is not the best location for me and when I came home from work that day I did not want to find that pole in front of my window.
I was getting ready for work when I looked out the window and saw the utility company starting to erect a pole in front of my house. they were going to position it directly in front of my picture window.
No way, absolutely no way was I going to permit this. I gulped down my last bit of coffee and went directly to the crew supervisor and told him in no uncertain terms that I was not going to permit his crew to put that stupid electrical pole directly in front of my picture window.
He took out a plat map, a map for pole locations and a right of way document and explained that it is the best location for it. I told him it is not the best location for me and when I came home from work that day I did not want to find that pole in front of my window.
To determine YOUR personality pick the gift you’d most like to get:
1. Candy
2. Flowers
3. A sweet poem
4. Sex
5. Dinner/Dancing
6. Waffle iron
If you answered...
1. CANDY
It means that...
you are a sweet person who enjoys traditional gifts and hopefully likes to share...
OR
you’re a selfish chocoholic who values a sugar high over everything even true love.
* * * * *
If you answered...
2. FLOWERS
It means that...
you love the beauty of nature, the scent of flowers and appreciate this timeless romantic gesture...
OR
you get some twisted joy out of watching vegetation wither and die.
* * * * *
If you answered...
3. A SWEET POEM
It means that...
you’re a hopeless romantic, a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the written word...
OR
you’re used to cheap gifts and like to pass yourself off as a cultured person who recognizes the power and beauty of the written word.
* * * * *
If you answered...
4. SEX
It means that...
you are a passionate soul, a free spirit who is not afraid to express your sexuality with another consenting adult and feel that the physical side of love can be meaningful and beautiful...
OR
you’re a filthy degenerate who is no better than a rutting animal living solely for one carnal experience after another.
* * * * *
If you answered...
5. DINNER/DANCING
It means that...
you enjoy the company of that special someone and the romantic setting of fine cuisine and candlelight...
OR
you’re easy to please and probably willing to sell your body for food and a few quick turns around the dance floor.
* * * * *
If you answered...
6. WAFFLE IRON
It means that...
you’re a practical person who believes in gifts that you can actually use...
OR
you have absolutely no idea of what gift-giving is all about and probably have some sort of deviant sexual fetish involving kitchen appliances.
All clear?
Well, why don’t you share the test with your friends - there’s nothing like getting to know each other REALLY well! ;)
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